Stop feeling like an angry mom. You just are lacking in one of these 6 areas. Fix it and be a happier mom.
Mama Cuckoo birds lay their eggs in nests of other birds and hit the road, never to return again.
When black eagle moms see their chicks fighting, they usually sit back until one kills the other.
And black bears who only have one cub (instead of two or three), often just leave it to die. It’s simply a ‘waste’ of their time.
Today, I put myself in a category with those jerky moms.
I was that mom that you saw at the store screaming “why won’t you all listen” at her scattered kids. Then, I was that mom later sitting on the park bench, absolutely defeated – my hair a mess and my expression blank. Yet again, I was that mom who got excited, after that draining day, to put her kids to bed and sink into the couch.
I don’t feel like this every day. However, when I do have angry-mom days I feel equally as terrible as those harsh mama animals.
Related: 5 Tips for Moms Returning to Their Roots.
We Aren’t Angry- We are Deprived
Did you know that certain beetle moms eat until they are full, then (and only then) their offspring get the leftovers- if there are any.
Of course, as humans we don’t do this; we do the complete opposite. We often totally deplete ourselves of emotional, physical, and spiritual needs until we have nothing left to give.
Our negative feelings and outbursts come from a place of overwhelm and exhaustion.
Before you label yourself as an “angry mom”, consider that you may actually just need one of these 5 things:
1. Some Quiet Time
Sensory overload is actually a growing problem for modern parents. Sensory overload happens when you’re getting more input from your five senses than your brain can manage and process. For some people, this feels like your brain is “stuck”, and you can’t focus or prioritize things.
The outcome? You guessed it: Anger and frustration!
Never underestimate the value of quiet time. Even if it is just for 10 minutes at a time, when you feel overwhelmed step away. I tell my husband to distract the kids and I sneak away for a hot bubble bath.
2. Someone to Listen or Help
Sometimes we need someone to give us suggestions or help us solve our problems. While other times, we just need someone to say, “yeah, that sucks”.
Finding a friend, family member, or neighbor who will listen is invaluable. Even a Facebook moms group could offer some support or insight. Your support group will assure you that you are not, in fact, an angry mom.
After you Yell, try these 5 things to reconnect with your kids.
3. Sleep or Rest
I can’t even remember what it feels like to have a good nights sleep. A tired mom is an irritable mom. An irritable mom is a short tempered mom.
Prioritize your own sleep and rest. I know it is hard but these tips here will help you relax your mind and get some much needed ZZZ’s.
4. Basic Needs
If you ever wondered if hangry (or being extra irritable due to the feeling of hunger) was real, check out the Merriam-Webster Dictionary.
Oh, it’s real. It’s common. It’s brutal.
If you don’t tend to your basic needs, such as eating, drinking, and washing your hair on occasion, you will be easy to anger. It’s a fact of life. If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t properly take care of another human being.
5. A Little Love and Affection
My dear, you are not a robot. You can’t expect to cook, clean, and wipe bums without a little love and affection.
Do you need a cuddle with your kid, a little something-something from your husband, or a supporting talk with your mom?
Whatever type of affection you need, do not be afraid to go out and get it.
6. A Hobby or a Goal
Many times in motherhood, we start to lose track of who we really are. If you go too long without being true to you, it will become harder to find yourself.
A great way to spend some quality time with yourself is to develop and focus on a hobby or a goal.
Personally, I LOVE photography (proof: click on “photography blog” under my blog menu). When I am taking pictures, I feel alive. I also incorporate my kids into my photography hobby, so it is a win-win.
Goals are a great way to focus your energy in a positive way. Read about goal-setting tips for moms here.
Final Thoughts on the Angry Mom Feeling
The question now is which of these things do you need? Take some time to analyze what may be lacking that is causing to you to feel irritable and get mad.
And if you still feel like an inadequate mother, just compare yourself to the harp seal. When her babies are 12 days old, she leaves them alone on the ice (unable to swim or fend for themselves), so she can go find a new mate.
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