Self Care Tips Designed for Raising Kids who are Emotionally Healthy
My kids rolled their eyes and repeated after me, "even when I struggle, I will keep going. I am proud of myself."
Although I actually do feel like I have been living under a rock recently, I have heard the buzz words "positive affirmations" and self care. Simply put, positive affirmations are positive phrases or statements used to challenge unhelpful thoughts.
I figured my kids could use some extra stability and positivity in their lives right about now. I mean, couldn't we all?
At first, my three kids were reluctant to repeat these positive (okay, slightly cheesy and cliché) phrases, but when we made this part of our bedtime routine they started to look forward to it.
But, let's rewind to why we started positive affirmations and self care routines in the first place.
But do Positive Affirmations Really Work?
Being the research-junkie that I am, I was determined to find out if there were actual proven benefits to performing daily affirmations - or- if it was just another silly trend.
Interestingly, there is actual MRI evidence suggesting that certain brain pathways are increased when people practice self-affirmation tasks (Cascio et al., 2016). The part of the brain (called the ventromedial prefrontal cortex) that is involved in positive valuation becomes more active when we consider our personal values (Falk et al., 2015; Cascio et al., 2016).
So, what does this actually mean? Well, self care and repeating positive phrases has been shown to:
- Help with the tendency to linger on negative experiences (Wiesenfeld et al., 2001).
- Be linked to academic achievement by stopping GPA decline in students who feel left out at college (Layous et al., 2017)
- Lower stress levels (Weisenfeld et al., 2001).
- Used effectively in leading people to improve their physical behavior (Cooke et al., 2014)
Essentially, having positive conversations with oneself can improve physical and mental health. It is basically a quick dose of self care for your developing kids.
Related: How to Hardwire Kids for Happiness
Self Care for Kids and Teens
A great way to get your child to understand the purpose of self care is with this wellness meter. It helps them be mindful of their own emotional status and have a plan of action.
Practicing self care routines and positive affirmations at a young age can help kids become more prepared to use them when facing obstacles later in life.
These 3 simple tips will help you get the ball rolling on daily affirmations:
1. Work affirmations into your normal routine
Find a quiet time to each day to practice self love affirmations with your kids. In my home, we do these at bedtime.
When they are lying in bed, I ask them to close their eyes. I hold their hands and have them repeat the affirmations after me.
Each night, we spend only a few minutes and repeat about 5 phrases. We go through each slowly so they have time to really think through the words they are saying.
2. Talk to your child about this new activity
Explain to your child that you will start doing "be positive" talks to help them grow into happy people.
Also, explain the importance of taking time to treat themselves like the special person that they are.
Ask for their input. What would they like to talk about before bedtime? Is there anything that is bothering them?
Related: Close Knit families do these 5 things daily
3. Personalize their affirmations
Consider what your child may need encouragement with in life.
- Is your child shy or struggling with self-esteem?
- Does your child need extra encouragement with school, sports, or coping with failure?
- Are you looking for another way to show your kid their value?
If you are unsure what affirmations to do, start general, such as:
- I am loved
- I am brave
- I am kind
- I am unique and beautiful
- I respect others and deserve to be respected
Print these 20 affirmations and use them as a guide, but use your heart and own family experiences to personalize your positive affirmations.
Final Thoughts on Self Love Affirmations for Kids
Positive affirmations are not the magic ingredient for raising the perfect kid, but when accompanied by a stable and loving home, they have immense benefits.
Once you work through your first week of eye-rolling and resistant groans, you will see the long-lasting benefits of a positive mindset shine through in your kids lives.
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ohh woow....really enjoyed my read & learnt much more of positive affirmations for kids, gonna practising with my little niece. cheers, siennylovesdrawing
I think yes in these times we need to inculcate the art of positive affirmations in children as well. Besides as suggested by you that there's are related scientifically as well to the mental well being, so definitely useful to practise the same. I think I will take up this suggestion post of yours.
It was an amazing read ..
We really need some positive affirmations to live the positive and progressive life.
The 20 affirmations you mentioned are very helpful.
I’m a new parent so this is helpful for me for when my child grows up.
This was a great read! I’ll be sharing this on Pinterest. And coming from a not-so-great family, this is definitely something a lot of parents should teach their teens!
my kids are already grown up,son 21 yrs old daughter 19 yrs old..the way i bring them is the traditional way.the way my parents did it to us...god fearing,listen to parents,respect elderly.house chores.and im proud of them.when they gonna have their own family i know in my heart they can be a good parents too
Oh wow really enjoyed my read and learn a lot from this!
I didn't know that they could really see the difference in the brain - sound pretty interesting 🙂
Love this. I have used positive affirmations with my kids as a mom and as a teacher. It is so important for kids to know that they are valuable.
I always try to do it as much a possible, thanks for the info!
I do believe that positive affirmative work even for kids. I have tried with both my daughters.
I am going to try this with my daughter as part of her nighttime routine. The more positive we can be these days the better. Positive thoughts lead to positive actions.
I think that positive affirmations actually work, just something simple as reminding kids that they are loved, special and they can do everything can make a huge difference
This is a lovely post. Positive affirmations really do help kids (and adults).
I think of what is going on in the world, we can all use some positive affirmations!
Affirmations also provide us with the opportunity to learn to look at ourselves in the mirror. This is the most effective way to say an affirmation and learning to do this as a child makes it much easier to do.