Well done! If you notice these 7 traits of a resilient child, you are raising a strong and confident kid instead of a fragile and inflexible one!
My son posted a harmless YouTube video of himself hitting a baseball off a tee.
When I noticed he posted his own video, my eyes instantly darted to the comment section. Having experienced the nasty world of internet trolls myself, I braced for what I was going to read.
Unsurprisingly, there were a few mean comments. My heart instantly broke for my sweet and innocent son who was probably so excited to post the video.
I knew I had to approach him. Both about posting his own content and understanding how to take any negative feedback from “keyboard warriors”.
When I sat him down to gently talk him through this bullying, he said “Mom, come on – I don’t take those idiots seriously!”
I breathed a big sigh of relief. Was I, in fact, raising a resilient child?
7 Traits of a Resilient Child
Many children these days are fragile and inflexible. It’s the honest truth.
As parents, we try to raise our children to be strong and independent, but in our “everyone gets a trophy” society, it can be a major challenge.
Learn HOW to raise resilient kids in 3 steps here.
Are you are wondering if your child has the needed grit to take on this crazy world?
These 7 signs indicate that you are doing a great job raising a resilient kid.
1) They are comfortable with the unknown
Is your child excited about new experiences and opportunities in life?
Curiosity and openness towards new things in life is a common trait in resilient kids.
Some children are fearful of uncertainties in life; however, when parents nudge them into new situations they will become brave and adventurous.
Learn more on how to introduce shy kids to new experiences here.
2) They are critical thinkers (always asking questions)
Does your child ask a lot of questions before making up their own mind?
Critical thinking is a set of skills and habits of mind, including the ability to define a problem, identify assumptions, analyze pros and cons, and come to a decision. It also includes the ability to think openly and consider the point of view of others. This is an important trait of a resilient kid or teen.
Many kids today are taught to ‘just listen’ (not to analyze facts) – which inhibits their ability to think on their own.
These 6 Tips will Help you Raise Critical Thinkers.
3) They are proactive, yet patient
A big part resiliency and grit (aka strength of character) is planning ahead for what may come.
Often, we think of a resilient child as one who ‘bounces back’ quickly. However, what many don’t realize is that child already analyzed their situation are prepared for risks and obstacles.
They aren’t broken into pieces when they failed, because they knew this could happen and that sometimes accomplishments take time.
4) They have self-discipline
Resilient kids stay focused on their goals.
You can find your resilient child practicing, studying, exercising – without having to constantly remind them of these things.
They know what they want to achieve, and how to get there.
Also read: How to Spark Motivation in a Lazy Child
5) They don’t have a “Poor Me” mindset
A victim mindset is an unhealthy, self-destructive “poor me” attitude. Kids who feel this way have a hard time handling normal life circumstances, which can persist into adulthood.
When every moderately bad things happen in their lives, they have a serious problem coping.
On the other hand, a resilient child has a growth mindset. These children believe that even if they struggle with certain skills, they can work hard to improve over time.
Read Yang Le’s Special Olympic story on Resiliency.
6) They can calm down on their own
The ability to calm down on your own (or regulate your emotions) is a learnable skill.
Resilient kids typically master this skill.
Even if others have different views than them, they are flexible and open to listening to other view points and opinions without letting emotions get in the way.
The simple parenting tips here will help you teach your kid to calm down on their own.
7) They are Assertive
To demand respect is to tell others, “You will respect me or else.” However, to command respect is to have others observe and admire your actions without threat or consequence.
Resilient children are not typically jealous, bossy, or dominating.
They have mastered the trait of assertiveness. Kids with grit carry themselves in a respectful manner and have strong voices, which attract other children to them. They are natural-born leaders.
Learn how to teach kids to be assertive here!
Final Thoughts on Traits of a Resilient Child
Many modern children will crumble when they are trolled on social media. They may break when they fail or come up short in life.
But not resilient kids. They don’t take what others say too seriously, and they see failure simply as a challenge.
If you are raising a resilient child, well done.
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If you are raising a kid who gives up too easily, try these simple parenting tips to turn around their outlook on life!